Happy Mother's Day!
Introduction
6 talks I studied
that are excellent resources on mothers/womanhood. They were:
Are we not all
mothers; Sheri Dew
Certain Women; Linda
K burton
A sin resistant
generation; Joy D Jones
Behold thy mother;
Holland
A Plea to my
sisters; Nelson
A Mother Who Knows;
Julie B Beck
Before I lose anyone
to thinking they aren't a mother and so my talk doesn't apply, Sheri Dew said
this:
"Motherhood is more than bearing
children. … It is the essence of who we are as women….While we tend to equate
motherhood solely with maternity, in the Lord’s language, the word mother has
layers of meaning. Of all the words they could have chosen to define her role
and her essence, both God the Father and Adam called Eve “the mother of all
living”--and they did so before she ever bore a
child. Like Eve, our motherhood began before we were born. Just as
worthy men were foreordained to hold the priesthood in mortality, righteous
women were endowed premortally with the privilege of motherhood. Motherhood is
more than bearing children, though it is certainly that. It is the essence of who we are as women. It defines our very identity, our divine
stature and nature, and the unique traits our Father gave us." end quote
Just like no woman
is exempt from motherhood, no member of the church is exempt from being a
teacher and a student, or a missionary. It is a charge that has been given to
all, but is it something that we take
seriously?
Elder Matthew Cowley
taught that “men have to have something given to them [in mortality] to make
them saviors of men, but not mothers, not women. [They] are born with an
inherent right, an inherent authority, to be the saviors of human souls … and
the regenerating force in the lives of God’s children.” End quote
I
would add that the evidence for that is never more clear than obtaining a
temple recommend. Men must hold the Melchizedek Priesthood to obtain a recommend, women do not. Have
you ever pondered why that is?
You don't have to
look very hard to see the effects of the war Satan has waged on motherhood.
There is a legend about ship wreckers. The legend goes that men who would stand on the rocky shores and
raise up a light high in the air to imitate a lighthouse, or tie lights on
cattle and then walk them up and down the shores to imitate ships moving freely
in the waters. This would cause ships to run aground or crash upon the rocks
for the people on the shore to be able to claim the spoils. The ships were
drawn into safety by a false light.
Are there ways women
are being drawn away by false light from their true identity, and authority to be saviors of human souls?
There are many ways,
too numerous to count, but some might include the false belief that: Only women
who have children are mothers, You don't need a mother, Motherhood is less than
the priesthood.
Many years ago I
began to ponder more deeply the account of the stripling warriors, Who
"were men of truth and soberness, for they had been taught to keep the
commandments of God and to walk uprightly before him." Who did they
attribute this teaching to? "we did not doubt because our mothers knew
it." This is a phrase that went through my mind often, and it is something
that I've been pondering for at least 7 years. I began to ask myself what did
these mothers do. What would it look like today to be a mother of a stripling
warrior. I will tell you that is a lifelong question to answer and it will look
different for everyone. We and likewise our children are all blessed with
different challenges, and talents, and we will all be given different answers
as to how to become who we were created to be. I know that for me part of that
answer was walking away from our dream home and moving here to Edgewood for the
school my 2 youngest attend and for a simpler life where I could hopefully win
a part of the battle against electronics and boredom, with some good ole
fashion hard work. But that is only a
small part of that answer. There were many things that led up to that, things
which included reevaluating the implementation of the basics in our family.
Some of which we will discuss.
To me being a
stripling warrior mother/ righteous woman of God is about sacrifice. I'm
speaking of more than the obvious sacrifice mothers already make with their
bodies, time, and talents used in the rearing of children.
Every one of us has
an overarching obligation to model righteous womanhood because our youth may
not see it anywhere else. That is quite the responsibility and could require
huge amounts of sacrifice. I remember when my children started getting older,
and one day it finally occurred to me that if I was waiting for my children to
go to bed to watch something because I didn't think it was good for them, then
why did I think it was good for me. That realization hurt, and it took time to
slowly start taking away shows one by one as I evaluated them on their ability
to draw me to the Savior or away from Him. Change is hard and it takes time,
but I have found that things naturally
fall away instead of me making a list of things to take away when my heart is
focused on the Saviors desire to make me into something more than I could ever
make myself. Things naturally become offensive to me and it then becomes easy
to remove them. It is a slow evolution.
Julie B Beck said
that Mother's who know: "honor sacred ordinances and covenants. They
create a climate for spiritual and temporal growth in their homes. They plan
for prayer, scripture study, and family home evening. They build children into
future leaders and are the primary examples of what leaders look like." end quote
The biggest and most
effective thing we can do is be who we want our kids to be. We can't teach
anything if we first don't live it. "preach the gospel (or teach) at all
times and when necessary use words"
President Nelson
said: "Much of the major growth that is coming to the Church in the last
days will come because many of the good women of the world … will be drawn to
the Church in large numbers. This will happen to the degree that the women of
the Church reflect righteousness and articulate it in their lives and to the
degree that the women of the Church are seen as distinct
and different--in happy ways--from the women of the world.” end quote
What does it look
like to be distinct and different? Will it require some sacrifice? My kids
recently asked me what happened, I used to be cool now I'm just a super
religious nerd. I would say that the false light right now is telling us that
we don't want to be different. We want to blend in. To be cool. I have never
understood people who think it's a badge of honor if someone can't tell that
they are a Mormon. Inferring that they were hip and tolerant and somehow more
righteous than someone who was an obvious Mormon. By standing out and being
different its not about being
judgmental, but having standards and living as closely with the attributes of
Christ, and people should be able to spot that a mile away if you're doing it
right. Daring to look different. To be different. There are many ways in which
we stand out. No coffee or tea, modest clothing, clean language, dating
standards, etc…It's not about the health benefits of not drinking coffee or
tea, or the scientific facts about what uncovered body parts are deemed sexy,
or any other academic argument, because
we could argue those all day. It is about the Lord's chosen people standing out
and being different in ways that people recognize and know. It's about
sacrifice. So, What will you give up to know God. I
don't look at it as what I'm giving up, but what I am gaining. I always take comfort in finding someone else
standing out and want to provide that kind of comfort to someone else. The way
we carry ourselves, the things we are interested in, what things are important
to us, all make up who we are presenting to the world that we are. Do people
know who's we are as well?
President Nelson
went on to say:
Attacks against the
Church, its doctrine, and our way of life are going to increase. Because of
this, we need women who have a bedrock
understanding of the doctrine of Christ and who will use that
understanding to teach and help raise a sin-resistant generation. We need women
who can detect deception in all of its forms. We need women who know how to
access the power that God makes available to covenant keepers and who express
their beliefs with confidence and charity. We need women who have the courage
and vision of our Mother Eve." end quote
Another area of
false light we are up against is on the Character of Christ. Who He was and his
expectations or lack there of on his followers. The false light of not needing
to study the Character of Christ and emulate it.
I am a convert to
the church, and for years I felt inferior to everyone around me. I always
thought and said' well, I'm no scriptorian and I'll never be one. I'm not smart
enough.' I would believe that members of the quorum of the 12 and first
presidency were born superior and they were super human. Now you may laugh, it
manifest in me as excuse to not living like the apostles do because they are
different or there is a different expectation placed on them then there is for
me the common man. How many times did I wait to get my act together (so to
speak) until I received a calling? They are men, just like we are. Bednar talks
about being an elder in the priesthood -which is the same as every other Elder
in the church, only his stewardship is bigger, but it's the same priesthood
authority. The very same. I believe it has also been the mission of President
Eyring to help priesthood holders to realize they have the same power and
authority within their stewardships as he does in his, and to rise to it. The
only thing that holds us back is ourselves. One day I realized that my
knowledge of the gospel was in my hands. The only tutor I needed was the Holy
Ghost, and some good reference books, and studying repeatedly the words of
living prophets. When I added to that a more consistent Temple attendance and
family history for my ancestors, my understanding was taken to a level that I
didn't know I was even capable of. That
is how we gain the bedrock understanding of the doctrine of Christ that Nelson
talked about. It is also how we avoid being deceived by false light, so that we
can guide others along the path- whether our own children or someone
else's as well as ourselves. President Nelson also plead with
the sisters:
"My dear
sisters, nothing is more crucial to your eternal life than your own conversion.
It is converted, covenant-keeping women--women like my dear wife Wendy--whose
righteous lives will increasingly stand out in a deteriorating world and who
will thus be seen as different and distinct in the happiest of ways.
I thank you, my dear
sisters, and bless you to rise to your full stature, to fulfill the measure of your creation, as we walk arm in arm in
this sacred work. Together we will help prepare the world for the Second Coming
of the Lord." end quote
I love that phrase
fulfill or fill the measure of your creation. One day while sitting in the
temple I began to ponder that phrase that I usually just don't bother to think
about deeply. I thought of a measuring cup. It has a fill capacity. You can
fill that cup only partially if you want. I thought of what things are keeping
me from having a full measure of my creation, who I was born to be. I also began to ask myself 2 questions. What am I currently doing that I should stop and what am I not currently doing that I should start?
Now, what happens
when all our efforts don't seem to yield the fruit we were expecting. We
haven't been able to save everyone. I have begun to recognize that a lot of my
testimony has been dependent upon outcomes or blessings, but what we really
need a testimony of is our covenants. What I sometimes forget is the big part
of the plan of salvation called agency.
Aside from the atonement of Jesus Christ, agency is the most critical part of
the plan. What if in our stewardship there is a child, a friend, a primary
child, a yw/ym, a family member that your example wasn't enough to keep them
from following after false light. For me this has been the biggest test of my
faith, and also led me to understand Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ in a way
I never have before, and really to understand more deeply the plan of
salvation.
Elder Holland spoke
of a mother and her son who is struggling with same gender attraction. Of
Mothers he said "
You see, it is not
only that they bear us, but they continue
bearing with us. It is not only the prenatal carrying but the lifelong
carrying that makes mothering such a staggering feat. the impact of such love
will range between unbearable and transcendent, over and over again, until with
the safety and salvation of the very last child on earth, we can [then] say
with Jesus, ‘[Father!] I have finished the work which thou gavest me to do.’ ”
I love how Holland reminded mothers/women everywhere who may feel like they are
dyeing from a broken heart when he said:
children can break
their mothers’ heart. Here too we see another comparison with the divine. I
need not remind us that Jesus died of a broken heart, one weary and worn out
from bearing the sins of the world." end quote
It is important as
covenant keeping women that we do not become discouraged by the constant
attacks on every side from the fiery darts of the adversary. The false light
that seems to surround us. I loved how
sister Burton talked about keeping a can can list of things we can do, when
such discouragement comes upon us. We can take comfort that we know the outcome
of this war. Bruce R McConkie reminded
us 43 years ago:
“As members of the
Church, we are engaged in a mighty conflict. We are at war. We have enlisted in
the cause of Christ to fight against Lucifer. …
“The great war that
rages on every side and which unfortunately is resulting in many casualties,
some fatal, is no new thing. …
“Now there neither
are nor can be any neutrals in this war." end
quote
Maybe is time to
evaluate our commitment to this war and take head the admonition of Sheri Dew
who said:
Never has there been
a greater need for righteous mothers--mothers who bless their children with a
sense of safety, security, and confidence about
the future, mothers who teach their children where to find peace and
truth and that the power of Jesus Christ is always stronger than the power of
the adversary. Every time we build the faith or reinforce the nobility of a
young woman or man, every time we love or lead anyone even one small step along the path, we are true to our endowment
and calling as mothers and in the process we build the kingdom of God. No woman
who understands the gospel would ever think that any other work is more
important or would ever say, “I am just a mother,” for mothers heal the souls
of men.
Look around. Who
needs you and your influence.
We just can’t let
the Lord down. And if the day comes when we are the only women on earth who
find nobility and divinity in motherhood, so be it. For mother is the word that will
define a righteous woman made perfect in the highest degree of the
celestial kingdom, a woman who has qualified for eternal increase in posterity,
wisdom, joy, and influence." end quote
Wow, doesn't that
just fill you with a sense of duty?! So,
Who needs you and your influence, have you thought of anyone?
I have a deep and
abiding knowledge of the plan of salvation and my divine role as a woman and
mother in that plan. I am filled with hope that all my efforts to be successful
in doing my part to raise a sin resistant generation and to hepl as many others along
the covenant path as I can; will be sustained and upheld by the Lord and when I
fall short, or have to suffer the choices of others, the atonement of Jesus
Christ will be there to bear me up in strength, in comfort, and to make all
things whole I so testify.
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