“The principle of repentance is so important to your obtaining forgiveness that you ought to take stock of where you are now. Do you hold bitterness and hostility for someone who has wronged you? It doesn’t matter how deserved those feelings may be; if you cannot forgive the trespasser, according to the Lord, you have a greater sin than the person who wronged you. “The ultimate form of love for God and men is forgiveness,”
“What is our response when we are offended, misunderstood, unfairly or unkindly treated, or sinned against, made an offender for a word, falsely accused, passed over, hurt by those we love, our offerings rejected? Do we resent, become bitter, hold a grudge? Or do we resolve the problem if we can, forgive, and rid ourselves of the burden?
“The nature of our response to such situations may well determine the nature and quality of our lives, here and eternally. A courageous friend, her faith refined by many afflictions, said to me only hours ago, ‘Humiliation must come before exaltation’ [see D&C 29:2; 61:2; 136:33].
“It is required of us to forgive. Our salvation depends upon it. …
“It is reported that President Brigham Young once said that he who takes offense when no offense is intended is a fool, and he who takes offense when offense is intended is usually a fool. It was then explained that there are two courses of action to follow when one is bitten by a rattlesnake. One may in anger, fear, or vengefulness pursue the creature and kill it. Or he may make full haste to get the venom out of his system. If we pursue the latter course we will likely survive, but if we attempt to follow the former, we may not be around long enough to finish it.” (“Even as Christ Forgave,” New Era, June 1974, pp. 4–5.)
I love the analogy of the snake. I can think of a few others about drinking poison and pickle juice that have made it in recent general conference talks. I really began pondering this need to suffer humiliation for exhalation when I started reading “The Enoch Letters” by Neal A Maxwell.
We are living in a day much like Enoch. In Moses 6:27-29 we find out what the conditions were like:
27 And he heard a voice from heaven, saying: Enoch, my son, prophesy unto this people, and say unto them—Repent, for thus saith the Lord: I am angry with this people, and my fierce anger is kindled against them; for their hearts have waxed hard, and their ears are dull of hearing, and their eyes cannot see afar off;
28 And for these many generations, ever since the day that I created them, have they gone astray, and have denied me, and have sought their own counsels in the dark; and in their own abominations have they devised murder, and have not kept the commandments, which I gave unto their father, Adam.
29 Wherefore, they have foresworn themselves, and, by their oaths, they have brought upon themselves death; and a hell I have prepared for them, if they repent not;
How was this teaching received? In verse 37 it says that “all men were offended by him.” In verse 38 they go to look at him and observe the teachings of “the wild man that has come among us.” By verse 39 they began to fear him and realize the “he walked with God.”
Going back to my book about fictional letters sent between Mahijah (living in the city of Enoch) and his friend Omar living outside the city. It is very much in the style of the Screwtape letters. Only it’s not the devil trying to defeat his enemy God. This story takes you thru the journey of a man who discovers (against his own better judgment at first) that Enoch is a prophet. I love how boldly Mahijah writes to his friend. He dosn’t want to create tension between them and tells his friend that they both have to believe and do what they think is right. This doesn’t however stop Mahijah from continuing to tell his friend what he believes and knows and wishes that his friend did too. Another thing he does is tells of the journey of sanctification and living such levels of righteousness. It goes thru the process, because it was a process. The people didn’t go from being wicked to righteous overnight. Now how long this took, we are not sure. We know that Enoch was 65 when he had his son Methuselah and then sometime after that he started talking to the Lord. We also know that he lived 365 years. So, it took a long time. Longer than any of us have on this earth :0)
In this wicked world in which we live, it is becoming increasing more frightening to share your beliefs. Faithful Christians are lambasted as hateful, dull-witted, bigoted, intolerant etc. You have the potential of being attacked relentlessly and viscously if you choose to speak out for what you believe. You also run the risk of being fired from your job. There are people who spend their days looking for ways to attack people. This can make even the most faithful loose heart or want to just stick their head in the sand and pray that it all goes away.
On Sunday I pulled out our copy of the church news. It was all about new mission presidents being trained. Every article had something useful in it, but I especially appreciated “Fear Not” by President Uchtdorf. He talked about the change that came over Peter after Christ’s resurrection and appearance to him. He want from being fearful to being empowered. He didn’t stop being ridiculed, tortured and imprisoned after Christ’s resurrection, it intensified - yet he did not fear.
“From Easter morning on, Peter was a new man. He had been born again. For the rest of his life, Peter faced threats, ridicule, hatred and humiliation. But he did not back down. He feared no man. Nothing kept him form fulfilling his mission to raise his voice as a witness of his Savior, Jesus Christ.” ~ Uchtdorf
How do we make that transformation like Peter did? Uchtdorf talked about inclining our hearts and minds towards the Savior. I think about something that Elder Bednar talks about. Knowing the character of Christ. When we truly know and understand his character we trust and have faith in Him. It’s the path of continuous conversion. Baby step by baby step that conversion grows deeper and deeper roots until it is unshakable.
I’m not sure who else noticed the major theme running thru general conference about having courage. We need to have increased strength and courage to weather the storms of opposition that are brewing.
So, if we are using Enoch as our guide. 1 man in the middle of wickedness that made a difference 1 person at time until it grew into a city. What can we learn from him? What do we need to do to prepare ourselves for living the celestial law?
Understanding the character of Christ is key to unlocking the power of forgiveness. We are going to need to figure out how to love and forgive those who hate us and despitefully use us and seek to do us harm. I recently found a story about George Albert Smith that I’m trying to pattern myself after.
“When George Albert Smith was a young man, he joined the Utah National Guard. Being a good rider and having an excellent mount, he made quite a dashing figure in the practice charges up Arsenal Hill. Some of his friends urged him to run for an office in the Guard, and he consented. During the next few weeks, however, a man whom he had supposed to be his friend circulated false charges to the effect that Smith was seeking to win by unfair means.
“Partly because of these rumors, Sergeant Smith failed to win the votes of his fellow guardsmen. So he did not win the promotion to which he felt he had been entitled. His heart was filled with bitterness and hate for the onetime friend who had treated him so unfairly.
“He went to Church and tried to forget about the unpleasant affair, but his heart was still full of resentment. He could not feel right about taking the sacrament. After meditating and praying, Brother George Albert Smith concluded that he, too, was in the wrong for continuing to nurse a grievance.
“He decided to relieve himself of the burden of hate that seemed to be doing him more harm than it was doing his enemy. He crossed the street and walked directly into the office of the man who had spread the rumors. As he entered the door, the man put up his arm as if in self-defense. No doubt he expected a fight. He knew in his heart that he had gravely wronged a friend. But George Albert Smith had not come to fight. On the contrary, his voice was soft and forgiving.
“‘My brother,’ he said, ‘I want you to forgive me for hating you the way I have for the last few weeks.’
“The man of rumors was immediately melted into contrition. ‘Brother Smith,’ he said, ‘you have no need for forgiveness. It is I who need forgiveness from you.’ Because of George Albert Smith’s courage and spiritual strength, the man who had made himself an enemy was completely subdued. He repented of his evil conduct and thereafter he and Brother Smith were once more good friends.” (Merlo J. Pusey, “The Inner Strength of a Leader,” Instructor, June 1965, p. 232.)
What I found most helpful is his honesty. He didn’t say why he hated him, but he did admit that he did. That is some soul ripping, humiliation. The hardest part about asking for forgiveness from someone that has done wrong to you is that you feel as if you are giving them the power. You have sunk to the depths and let yourself be seen as low in their eyes and potentially made them feel justified in their actions because you apologized. That’s the lie. It is a hard lie to get past. Let me tell you that you will get to some serious weeping and waling when you decide that is what you need to do. But, the reality is this - you now have all the power. You have tapped into the enabling power of the atonement. You are made whole and the poison is removed from your system. What the other person thinks about you is inconsequential. You may have an outcome like president Smith or it may go the other direction and seemingly make things worse. But when you understand how serious Christ is when he says “love your enemy” you know what you have to do. This is how you achieve city of Enoch status. We’ve got to get this down in small doses before the environment gets worse and the stakes are even higher.
It is important to seek the guidance of our Heavenly Father when dealing with such delicate issues as asking for forgiveness. We need to be sure all pride is stripped away and we don’t fall into the traps of saying the wrong thing by starting to list off all our grievances with that person. If you need to write it out, pray over it. I like this advice from Marion G Romney:
“In praying, I try to follow the teachings of these scriptures. When confronted with a problem I prayerfully weigh in my mind alternative solutions and come to a conclusion as to which of them is best. Then in prayer I submit to the Lord my problem, tell him I desire to make the right choice, what is, in my judgment, the right course. Then I ask him if I have made the right decision to give me the burning in my bosom that He promised Oliver Cowdery. When enlightenment and peace come into my mind, I know the Lord is saying yes. If I have a ‘stupor of thought,’ I know he is saying no, and I try again, following the same procedure.
“In conclusion, I repeat: I know when and how the Lord answers my prayers by the way I feel.
“When we learn to distinguish between the inspiration that comes from the Spirit of the Lord and that which comes from our own uninspired hopes and desires, we need make no mistakes. To this I testify.” (New Era, Oct. 1975, p. 35.)
I recently tried this approach out on an apology. I went thru 2 drafts before landing on the one. Each time I would pray and then go write and then pray again. I went from a 1 page apology down to one sentence. I know that the spirit does not work thru anxiety. If you are feeling anxiety, it isn’t the spirit of God. It just isn’t! I asked for the spirit of peace to know if what I landed on was right and the right time to deliver it and I received that promised peace.
If you’ve got the devil on your shoulder you just need to shake him off and bury that dead horse of the pain and the past that you are dragging around....those were some loose lyrics there by F + M , but I just had too :0) Don’t let him make you say a bunch of crap- by appealing to your ego - that is only going to make things worse.
This is hard soul shaping stuff and it isn’t easy. I had to cry out “Lord I believe, help thou my unbelief.” I needed strength to put my pride aside and it hurt. Like mega hurt. But it is totally worth it. Now if I may....I’m going to quote another secular song that I love right now.
“Cause you get lighter the more it gets dark...you’re such a Heavenly view...”
We can do this! (pep talk for myself, I can do this!) We can be a light in the dark, a heavenly view. A witness of truth. And maybe, just maybe, in our wildest dreams and aspirations.....we could achieve city of Enoch status AKA Zion!
In the meantime....
“Don't you quit. You keep walking, you keep trying, there is help and happiness ahead. Some blessings come soon. Some come late. Some don't come until heaven. But for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come. It will be alright in the end. Trust God and believe in Good Things to Come.” ~Jeffrey R Holland
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