Body Art

On Tuesday I had an appointment with my builder. This day was also my daughters birthday and my ( I say "my" because I can't figure out how to phrase it) anniversary. I was working on a very tight schedule and so was my builder. After some discussion he agreed to meet me between 2 and 2:30 instead of 3:00 because if we met at 3 it would be cutting it too close for the 20 minute drive to pick up the kids from school at 3:50. Now I normally avoid time frame appointments like the plague, but I figured I would just go with it and hope for the best. Of course my youngest was very tired that day and took a nap which I had to wake her up from to make it to this appointment. I arrived at 2:15 nice and in the middle. At 2:45 I call and ask him where he was to which he replies that he is just coming up the main street that leads to the house. This is a fairly long road, but from it's farthest point you are looking at only 10-12 minutes out. Minutes and minutes pass and I am growing increasingly more furious. Trying to keep my 2 little ones from destroying the car and my sanity was not going well. We couldn't get out of the car and just roam around on this particular day because of the volume of people working on the house. It was just too dangerous. Finally he shows up at 3:15, a full 30 minutes from when he was "coming up the street". At this point I have already severely lectured the man about a thousand times in my mind so it is time to move on and get down to business because I now only have 10 minutes to go over everything we had to talk about. Enter body art..........

I get out of the car and beg the kids to please stay in the car and to stay out of trouble while I talked to the builder. Now keep in mind this was a very short visit and I am standing just feet from the car which my son keeps getting in and out of. I had no idea of the permanent marker fiasco occurring inside the vehicle. Now you might wonder why there was a permanent marker in my car to which I reply " I have no flippin idea other than to torment me." We have brown and black 2 tone leather in the suburban. Now, where do you think I found this black marker? Could there be some small miracle and it end up on the black? Nope, right smack in the middle of the seat on the brown. I didn't even have the time nor the strength to be upset because my daughter was about to pee her pants and I was now going to be 20 minutes late picking up my kids from school. I got the kids and a nice little tongue lashing from them and raced home to get Jordy to the bathroom. I was trying everything to get the ink off of the leather while she was in the house going to the bathroom. When I came in the house to check on her I found quite the disturbing scene. I found marker in a place I was not expecting. I was choking back laughter until I found out that she was not the artist, but that it was her brother, this made the scene all the more disturbing to which I immediately locked him in his room until his Father could deal with the situation. The evidence of what transpired in the car kept revealing itself throughout the evening. When we were dropping off half the kids at a friends birthday party I found more marker on the brown fabric covering for the sun roof and then that night when I was putting Jordy in bed I found more body art. When I was trying to clean off the marking on her she replied, "what about my bum bum?" Oh, great. Let's take a look. On her left bum there was a stick figure and some other nondescript scenery. What is going through my children's minds. Of all the parts on the body to color! Jordyn has always loved drawing on her body and can scarcely go more than a couple of days without new body art that she has drawn herself but I guess she has decided that it is now better to have her 5 yr old brother do the art for her. So, she apparently convinced her brother to be her tattoo artist or he convinced her that he is better at it than she is. Which ever is the case I am going to need a padded room soon.