Back to my new favorite people in the world. Without me looking back through my calendar I would have to say that we met some of these people for the first time around August- October??? Sorry can't remember. They had picked our Stake to film the family history to temple experience. Lots of names were submitted to them via our stake president for interviews. We were one of those families. We interviewed with them as a family and I walked away feeling scared because I was pretty sure they were going to select us. Lots of time passed and we didn't hear anything so I began to think I had indigestion on that day and they had so many other wonderful families to choose from so why on earth would they pick us. Turns out, we were selected. We had an initial meeting with everyone selected and the film crew so they could tell us what the objective was. We signed release forms, given a personal video camera and did a little initial filming in the church building talking with the the family history consultants. We also left with an appointment for our first in home filmed interview.
We had no idea what to expect that first interview. We also had no idea if any of the footage would ever be turned into anything. We knew how many people were being filmed and there was only so much they needed to turn into something for the church. So, they arrived, moved all the furniture around, got the lighting just right and the cameras all set up and ready to go. It was a 6 or 7 hour adventure and I cried like a baby through my entire interview. I thought for sure none of it was usable because they didn't want my crying to be interpreted as pain so I needed to try and smile while restating some of the things I said. I thought for sure I came off looking like a crazy person, but I felt safe and in good hands so I went with it. They left and we continued to work on FH and took our very first batch of names to the temple as a family. They filmed us going into the Temple and then interviewed us again after our experience. I think it was around the end of October or the beginning of November when we had that last interview after our Temple trip. We still had the video camera so I kept filming our experiences, but that was the last we had heard from them until this month.
There was a youth FH fair that was like a youth conference that I attended with the yw of our ward in March. There was a video about pizza and laptops that a youth group did to get their ward involved in FH. As I was talking to one of my yw about the video we decided to do the same thing in our ward. I was already wanting to get the scouts together so I could work on the genealogy merit badge with them because I had signed up to be a merit badge counselor. It was just perfect (inspired) timing that we decided to involve the entire youth instead of just the scouts. We had a joint activity coming up in April and the Deacons asked me to take over the night so we could move forward with this FH activity. We decided to have 4 stations. Merit badge, indexing, intro to FH and advanced FH. We got our FH advisors to come and I called in a couple of friends that are experts as well so we could have enough help. We also had to work really hard at getting the word out because it had been spring break and general conference so using time at church to get the word out wasn't going to work. As soon as the date was scheduled the FH crew sent and email saying they were coming back in town and they wanted to film us some more and show us the videos they had made with our family. I sat and stared at that email forever because I knew I needed to tell them about the event we were having but really did not want to. For the major front I put up of self confidence, it is really very small behind closed doors. I couldn't figure out how to word it or what to even say. They were going to be here on Friday and our activity was for the Tuesday before. I finally wrote down something acceptable and closed my eyes and hit send. Sure enough they wanted to film the event so now I was under pressure to produce and amazing event and get 50 plus release forms signed in addition to praying for a miracle that this event would actually work. Aside from my miserable failure trying to teach the "why" of FH to a bunch of deer in the headlights and looks of "I know your tricks of calling us out by name and if you do, so help me I will shank you"( I was seriously wishing for a trap door to swallow me up at this point)....the night went better than I could have expected and we had tons of people there. I came home from that night and laid down on the family room floor and just stared at the ceiling for probably an hour.
On Friday the film crew came back and did all their lighting and setting up and we all were interviewed again. This time I was smart though and told them I was feeding them so that everyone wasn't starving. I knew that if the last evening filming was any indication of what to expect this time, they were going to be there until 11 pm. The funny thing was that I had been too busy cooking and cleaning and I have really slowed down on my obsession with the news so I didn't know about the whole pressure cooker talk. I decided to keep it simple and make some black bean soup because it would be easy to eat whenever we had the chance. To cook beans here in this altitude you really need a pressure cooker. The first thing they said when they got here was (in a whisper) "pst, hey guys, she's a terrorist!" Oh my gosh so funny. Anyway....this time I was not weepy like I was in my first interview. I hope that my interview came of strong and happy and not cold and hard......So much self doubt. The reason I began to worry so much is because we were shown the videos about our family. First was one of Emma and Jared and the director filmed us on his phone watching the video. It felt like they had said so little but it came together so nicely. I was so impressed at their abilities and of my children's ability to convey a testimony. So good. Then they pulled out this other video. Words flashed across the screen "my conversion" my heart started to race. Was there really an entire video about myself. I also noticed that the director was no longer in the room. I understand now why he couldn't watch me watch it. I had an out of body experience watching myself and my testimony. I could hardly believe that something so beautiful and inspiring came out of all my blubbering. Not to take away from anything I said, because I said all those things and felt all those things, but the way it was put together was beautiful. The director is very talented. I'm not using any of their names here because, well, they didn't sign any release forms for me. hahaha :0) Not sure that it matters but this is my experience and it kinda keeps it that way if I keep at least their names to myself.
This entire experience has been amazing. I got to "experiment upon my words...with the smallest particle of faith....and many things were revealed unto me." Alma 32:27 Doing your own FH is a sacred work and responsibility. My testimony has grown in ways that I didn't know were even possible. My ability to feel pure joy has increased. The world is literally falling apart around us and I have gained perspective and direction on what my focus needs to be. I have a deeper love and capacity to find the good in others and a desire to lift and strengthen them. I have a passion for sharing what I know so that everyone can experience what I have. I am grateful that the Lord loves me and didn't give up on me long ago and that he never ever will. I know that I am a literal daughter of Heavenly Father which means that I have his DNA in me which means that all things are possible through Him. How amazing is that statement alone? He can take a rundown jalopy like myself and reveal it's true nature, a Maserati. It just takes some time in the repair shop and a willingness to put aside the things of the world and "Come follow me."
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