We went on a quest for wedding rings....My 14 year old son thought this was a hilarious activity. Like girls need anymore reason to be encouraged to fantasize about future weddings. haha
It had a purpose, though most of that purpose could be attributed to good ole fashion, girl fun. Seriously though, the rings value was attributed to choosing a companion for eternity......you want him to hold his "values."
I took the idea and tweaked it a bit. I love the good, better, best analogy and use it whenever I can. So we started with a good choice for a husband- the ring pop. When it gets down to it, all your left with is a nub. It was fun while it lasted, but not eternal.
Next stop, fancy fakes. It was fun seeing what kind of guy they would describe that went with each of these categories. It looks like the real deal, but soon you find your finger turning green and the shiny metal becoming dull. One small crisis like jumping in the pool with it on or stepping on it and the ring is weakened. This guy has values and standards but has a hard time holding to them.
Last stop - the real deal. These rings can withstand the test of time. They hold their value and they are kept safe and protected until the purchaser is serious and ready to buy. I had the girls give me a list of qualities they had in their "must have" category when it came to evaluating a potential eternal companion. It was fun to see what kind of things they found important and must have. I then asked if the girls were prepared to have the things on this list. For instance: if the potential EC says that he can't go on a date with you because he has to go home teaching or do a service project..... what do you say. If he has to work a lot so he can be self sufficient or to reach a goal, does it bother you? Things to think about.
*So, I was reading in my scriptures this morning (I'm doing a rare addition to a post)....and you know how I love to quote scripture.....I found an excellent description of the qualities that go in the "real deal" category.
Alma 53
20 And they were all young men, and they were exceedingly valiant for acourage, and also for strength and activity; but behold, this was not all—they were men who were true at all times in whatsoever thing they were entrusted.
21 Yea, they were men of truth and asoberness, for they had been taught to keep the commandments of God and to bwalk uprightly before him.
Now I've got "Army of Helaman" stuck in my head :0)Thank goodness I've already got my EC. I couldn't even imagine having to go through the dating process in this day and age. As an adult that has lived a lot of life and having seen some of the challenges of the youth today, it would be hard. My non-negotiable qualities are things that I'm not sure I had as well defined back when I was looking (a natural protection against the impossible). Now I would say that I couldn't be with someone who wasn't a leader. Who wasn't ambitious. Who didn't take his priesthood responsibilities seriously, etc... It's been years of growing together and helping each other reach our fullest potential that this new level of expectation was born. Luckily we both saw the potential in each other because no one is perfect (far from it) and we've done a whole lot of growing and changing in 19 years of marriage. There is a lot of polishing that has to happen to keep that ring shiny.
We finished off our ring themed night with one final ring. A donut. Boy was there serious regret after eating that donut! :o)
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