In the early morning of the hours just before I wake, sometime my brain is really clear and active. It has proven to be a time of clarity in thought for me.... Although.... on a few occasions I thought I had these deep insights and when I tried to recall what they were it was just a bunch of gibberish. What a bummer that is, to think you are onto something fantastic only to discover that your brain tricked you and you are really just cray cray....or am I the only one?
For some reason I was thinking about that leaf bug from yesterday and my little "I leaf this with you" title. It is customary after a talk, lesson or testimony for someone to say "I leave this with you in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen." Sometimes the "I leave this with you" is left off or it is "I leave these things with you..." What this, leaving with you, is really trying to communicate: I gift this portion of myself/my testimony to you.
What the receiver of this gift does with it, is entirely up to them. The gift is always given with the sincere hope and prayer that the receiver will take in and be equally edified from this hard earned truth they have gained. The hope is that the receiver will turn this gift into oil in their lamp and add it into what they already have. It is bringing that knowledge from unto to into that Elder Bednar talks about.
So, maybe the next time you hear those words you will think of what the person is saying as a gift and look for a way to bring that knowledge into your heart, even if it is something that you already know. There are many layers to each gospel principle and we need to be constantly striving to do better or our testimonies will wither and die. btw what was going on in my head this morning was a lot more awesome than what I just wrote! :0)
On a somewhat unrelated side note, This whole not getting angry/ impatient/ frustrated is not working out so well for me.....Last night a couple with 2 little kids sat behind us at the movies and tortured us the entire night without apologizing once.... I wasn't thinking compassionate thoughts. Today Nate and I had to go to a mandatory parent meeting at the school my 2 oldest attend. I thought I was going to poke my eyes out at the inefficiency of it all and the rudimentary information that was being given. There's 2 hours of my life, I'll never get back!
I just need to walk around like "what about Bob" saying to myself over and over again "baby steps, baby steps!" This reminds me of something a cashier said to me one day while buying a bunch of donuts. Something to the effect that I was wound really tight. I wasn't even being mean on that day and I was with a friend, but I can be a bit intense sometimes. *Sigh* Haha Ok, one more story. Last week we had a salesman come to the house for a security system. I was not letting him play the "Mormon Card" and I was not playing his games. You know the ones "guess who's number 1" "guess how much this cost?" Each time he would ask me one, I would just stare at him and tell him that we both already knew the answer to that. When he wouldn't give up the dumb questions I finally told him to cut to the chase and give it to me straight. I did this in a nice but professional manner and he thought I was funny and said "boy you are stubborn aren't you?" Yep, that is a pretty good estimation. When he left, my daughter who had been listening in from another room came in laughing. She thought the whole scene was hilarious and that I have mad skills in dealing with salespeople. So, I guess you could call that intense or wound tight or just stubborn.
Sometimes those skills are useful and sometimes I just need to relax and roll with life a little better.
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